Summary: This article gives 7 ways churches-especially Evangelical churches-can address emotional abuse in Christian marriages better. Then this article documents 7 problems and...
Safe Churches & Friends
Male Victims of Marital Abuse: David and John’s Stories
Male Victims of Marital Abuse: David and John’s Stories We don’t talk enough about male victims of marital abuse. But men can be chronically manipulated, emotionally abused,...
Stop Bashing Divorce Survivors From the Pulpit
No! Not Another Sermon That Bashes Innocent Divorce Survivors! It’s painful when Valentine’s Day falls on Sunday — or when the annual marriage sermon is on the schedule. Many...
Divorce Isn’t Proof You’re Weak — It May Be Proof You’re Strong
Does A Divorce Mean My Faith Is Weak?No, not if you needed a life-saving divorce to save your life and sanity—and your children's. In fact, it takes tremendous FAITH to say, "I...
Does the Waite and Gallagher Study Really Say Your Marriage Will Become Happy If You Stay 5 Years? No!
Pastors, Christian marriage authors, and Christian radio programs like to quote the study by Dr. Linda Waite and journalist Maggie Gallagher, who found, "Two out of three...
Malachi 2:16 Timeline: When “God Hates Divorce” Entered English Bibles
DOES THE BIBLE SAY "GOD HATES DIVORCE"? The so-called "God hates divorce" verse is from Malachi 2:16. The book of Malachi was written more than 2,400 years ago, nearly 500 years...
Harvard Study: No-Fault Divorce Saves Lives (Suicide, Violence, Homicide Drop)
Divorce Saves Lives When unilateral "no fault" divorce laws started passing one state at a time, starting with Governor Ronald Reagan in California in 1969, researchers wanted to...
What Was the Puritan View of Divorce?
What Was the Puritan View of Divorce? Were There Any Puritan Divorces? Although the Puritans wanted to create a godly society in America, they were realistic about abuse,...
When Your Friend Doesn’t Believe You’re Being Abused
When Your Friend Doesn’t Believe You’re Being Abused When a Christian Friend Questions Your Divorce What do you say if a dear Christian friend disagrees with your decision to...
John Calvin Said Abused Wives Should Be Set Free
Does God Want an Abused Spouse to Stay? John Calvin’s birthday is July 10, and I want to talk about something many Christians have never heard: Calvin was not soft on men who...
Escape Plan: 50-Item Checklist
Escape Plan: If You Are Thinking About Leaving (UPDATED May 2026) An important note: These are basic lists for people who are in difficult relationships but not in physical...
List of Puritan Divorces Between 1639 and 1692
This table shows every known divorce among the Massachusetts Puritans 1639-1692. There are 40 divorces listed and the columns give the record location and page, the date, the...
Marriage Counseling in Abusive Situations is Unethical
Why Couples Counseling When There’s Abuse Isn’t Just Unhelpful—It Can Be Dangerous Many well-meaning therapists don’t understand: couples counseling is clinically...
Good vs Bad Pastoral Counselors: Marital Abuse
Is It Safe to Tell Your Pastor About Your Marriage Problems? Stories from the Survey: Some Good Experiences and Some Bad Ones First: Good Experiences with a Pastor (Editor's...
Good vs Bad Pastoral Counselors
Is It Safe to Tell Your Pastor Your Marriage Problems? In 2020, an informal Facebook survey question was posed to 800 Christians who were considering or had gotten a...
Do my pastors have a say about me getting a divorce?
Does my pastor have to give permission for me to divorce? No. Your pastor does not get to decide or grant permission. Your pastors may have influence in your church community,...
11 Ways to Know if a Church is Safe for Abuse Victims or Divorcees
11 Ways to Know if a Church is Safe for Abuse Victims or Divorcees Are you looking for a new church when you need a separation or divorce? Did you know that nearly 6 in 10...
Sermon Ideas for Domestic Violence Awareness Month (October): A Biblical Guide for Pastors
October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month, and many pastors are asking: How should the church address domestic violence from the pulpit? If you are looking for sermon ideas on...
Official Christian Denominational Divorce Rules: Abuse, Adultery, and Remarriage
Official Christian Denominational Divorce Rules: Abuse, Adultery, and Remarriage Side-by-side comparison chart of more than 45 church denominations' public policies ▶️ Watch the...
Dear Pastor (Notes from an Abused Christian Wife)
(Background: Here are two letters from devout Christian wives who were abuse victims. Brenda Linn gave me permission to share her notes publicly. When she went to her former...
Jesus Said, “Love My Enemy”—Can I Still Divorce Them?
If you’re new to my blog, please start here: https://lifesavingdivorce.com/about/. I’m a committed Evangelical Christian. I began leading Christian divorce recovery groups in...