The Funniest and Fiercest Responses to the Heritage Foundation’s Push to Make Divorce Harder My Facebook post about the Heritage Foundation’s plan to reward marriage financially...
Abuse and Divorce
Heritage Foundation’s Plan to Make Divorce Harder: A Critique
Heritage Foundation’s Plan to Make Divorce Harder: A Critique The Heritage Foundation says America can be “saved” by strengthening marriage and family. In practice, some of its...
How to Afford Divorce When Your Spouse Controls the Money
How Can I Afford to Divorce? When people ask me, “How can I afford to divorce?” I hear the fear underneath it: I finally see that I may need to leave, but I do not have the money...
The Marriage Looked Fine from the Outside—So Why Was It Killing Me?
When a Marriage Looks Fine but Is Quietly Destroying You Sometimes the marriage that looks “fine” from the outside is slowly crushing the person living inside it. Not because...
Rating Focus on the Family’s Premarital Advice Articles
Scorecard for Premarital Articles from Focus on the Family Are you a pastor, parent, or friend wondering whether certain Focus on the Family articles are wise premarital reading?...
Rating Focus on the Family’s Marriage Advice
Scorecard for Marriage Ministry Articles from Focus on the Family How Focus on the Family handles abuse, separation, and divorce Which articles help abuse victims—and which make...
Safety Is Biblical: When a Marriage Becomes Harmful
Getting to Safety Is Biblical When a Marriage Becomes Harmful Almost every time I say, “Safety is biblical,” someone pushes back and brings up one of the 8 standard objections....
Tim Challies Tells Christians to Stay in Bad Marriages. That Is Dangerous
Tim Challies Tells Christians to Stay in Bad Marriages. That Is Dangerous Counsel. Summary: A critique of the January 2026 article To Those Who Married Poorly, including a...
What Resources Does Focus on the Family Give to Abuse Victims on Social Media?
Thousands of Pleas for Help Every week, thousands of people reach out to Focus on the Family, many “experiencing painful and often destructive situations… even incidents of...
“Let No Man Separate” Doesn’t Mean No Divorce for Any Reason — Matthew 19:6
Jesus Gave a Command Against Breaking a Marriage through Marriage-Endangering Sin Not a Statement of Impossibility of Divorce When Jesus said, "let no man separate" he was not...
Abuse Isn’t “Subjective”: How Control Patterns Are Measurable (Even in Christian Counseling)
The Pushback: “Abuse is 'subjective': Maybe She's Overreacting." When it comes to physical and emotional abuse in Christian contexts, one of the most common pushbacks I see on...
How to Tell if an Abusive or Deceptive Partner Has Really Changed
Checklist: How to Tell if an Abusive or Deceptive Partner Has Really Changed Note: Don't give this list to the abuser or cheater. See why at the end. People often assume that an...
When Divorce Is Called “Violence” but Abuse Is Not: What Sermons Reveal
When Divorce Is Called “Violence” but Abuse Is Not Dr. Valerie Hobbs, a linguist and senior lecturer at the University of Sheffield in the U.K., has spent years studying how...
Pastor Education: How to Respond Biblically to Abuse and Betrayal in Marriage
Pastor Education: Sharpening Your Skills for Marital Crisis These resources are for pastors and ministry leaders who want to respond wisely to oppression in the form of domestic...
Why James Dobson’s Article Is So Useful to Predators
Why James Dobson’s Article Is So Useful to Predators Many people wonder why Jeffrey Epstein would recommend a James Dobson article to one of his victims. For audio summary in...
Gray Divorce: One Woman Tells Her Story
Why Do So Many Retirees and People in Long Marriages Get a Gray Divorce? Why Older Adults Risk Everything to Leave a Destructive Marriage While interviewing Christian divorcees...
There Is No Divorce Crisis — There Is a Marriage-Endangering Sin Crisis
If you're new to my blog, read this first. I'm a committed Christian who started leading Christian divorce recovery groups in Evangelical churches in 1998. I write about...
Focus on the Family’s TikTok on Single Moms: A Harmful Soundbite
Critique: Focus on the Family’s TikTok on Single Mothers and “Brain Trauma” Several people reached out to me about a troubling 60-second TikTok clip from Focus on the Family...
Yes, Dr. Gary Chapman, Divorce Can Lead to Personal Happiness
Yes, Dr. Gary Chapman, Divorce CAN Lead to Personal Happiness Dr. Gary Chapman, author of The Five Love Languages says: "Understand That Divorce Will Never Lead To Personal...
How to Defend Yourself against “You Made Your Bed; Now Lie in It”
How to Defend Yourself against “You Made Your Bed; Now Lie in It” 3 Reasons You Didn’t See Warning Signs or Red Flags One of the clearest signs someone is not a safe friend is...
15 Steps to Start the Divorce Process if You Need a Life-Saving Divorce
15 Steps to Starting the Divorce Process, if You Need a Life-Saving Divorce First, make sure you (and the kids) are safe. If your spouse has weapons or has a history of...