Hosea Is Prophetic Symbolism, Not a Marriage Manual When I post about some divorces being biblical, I get comments such as this one: “Read the Book of Hosea,” as if Hosea’s...
Adultery and Infidelity
How to Tell if an Abusive or Deceptive Partner Has Really Changed
Checklist: How to Tell if an Abusive or Deceptive Partner Has Really Changed Note: Don't give this list to the abuser or cheater. See why at the end. People often assume that an...
Is Divorce Really “Contagious”? What the Church Keeps Missing
When “Divorce Is Contagious” Misses the Real Story A response to Erin Smalley—and the people who protested her interpretation in the comments Erin Smalley’s Focus on the Family...
You Are Not Sinning by Refusing to Care for Someone Who Harmed You
You Are Not Sinning by Refusing to Care for Someone Who Harmed You Why the Bible Does Not Require Survivors to Become Caretakers After my first post about why an abused or...
If Your Christian Husband Cheated for 8 Years, Do You Have to Be His Caretaker?
Here's an imaginary letter from a wife, which represents a common question in my Life-Saving Divorce private online group. Dear Gretchen, I’ve been married for more than forty...
Christians: Life After Divorce — Real Stories of Challenge, Healing, and Hope
I asked people in my private Facebook group for divorced Christians: "How has life changed?" Background: For nearly 30 years, I have been leading Christian divorce recovery...
Quiz: Moral Injury & Christian Abuse Survivors who Divorce
Moral Injury and Christian Abuse Survivors who Divorce Scroll down to the Moral Injury Quiz below. What is Moral Injury? The concept of “Moral injury” refers to the...
Gray Divorce: One Woman Tells Her Story
Why Do So Many Retirees and People in Long Marriages Get a Gray Divorce? Why Older Adults Risk Everything to Leave a Destructive Marriage While interviewing Christian divorcees...
There Is No Divorce Crisis — There Is a Marriage-Endangering Sin Crisis
If you're new to my blog, read this first. I'm a committed Christian who started leading Christian divorce recovery groups in Evangelical churches in 1998. I write about...
Marriage Myth: It Takes “Two to Tango” and “All Marriage Problems are 50/50”
This is Myth 7 of 27 Myths about marriage and divorce that aren't likely to be true of people who love God and take their faith seriously. These messages make us worry if we're...
Can I Divorce After Saying “For Better or For Worse”?
CAN I DIVORCE AFTER SAYING "FOR BETTER OR FOR WORSE"? When committed people of faith promise "for better or for worse" in our wedding vows, we take those words seriously....
Does “For Better or For Worse” Mean I Cannot Divorce?
DOES "FOR BETTER OR FOR WORSE" MEAN I CANNOT DIVORCE? Editor’s Note (2026): I’ve written a more comprehensive article examining all five traditional wedding vows (for...
25 Things to Do With Your Wedding Dress After Divorce
What Did You Do With Your Wedding Dress or Tuxedo After Divorce? I ran an informal poll in my private Facebook Group: Life-Saving Divorce for Separated or Divorced Christians....
Top 5 Myths About Divorce that Don’t Apply to Christians and Others of Deep Faith
5 MYTHS OF DIVORCE THAT DON'T APPLY TO COMMITTED CHRISTIANS (OR TO OTHER DEEPLY RELIGIOUS PEOPLE) Let’s face it, well-meaning friends and family and even counselors give us...
How Do I Know If My Abusive Spouse Has Really Changed? 3 Signs That Matter
How Do I Know If My Spouse Has Really Changed? Summary: This article gives 3 ways you can know if your abusive or addicted spouse has really changed and 3 signs that they have...
The Bible Teaches Us to Get Away from Abusers
Bible Verses That Support Leaving Destructive People Have Nothing to Do with Them: Abuse and Boundaries in Scripture We were taught to love, love, love. And forgive, forgive,...
25 Things to Do With Your Wedding Ring After Divorce
What Did You Do With Your Wedding and Engagement Ring After Divorce? I did an informal poll on my private Facebook Group: Life-Saving Divorce for Separated or Divorced...
There Is No Divorce Crisis. We have a Sin Crisis.
If you're new to my blog, read this first. I'm a committed Christian who started leading Christian divorce recovery groups in Evangelical churches in 1998. I write about...
I Thought It Was God’s Will To Marry This Person—Why Is This Marriage Unsafe?
When a God-Ordained Marriage Becomes Unsafe I thought it was God’s will for us to marry. I prayed earnestly. I asked for God’s guidance. I sought counsel from trusted...
Turning Point 4: Help! I Am Alone with the Abuser (often Gray Divorce)
Turning Point 4: Help! I Am Alone with the Abuser (Retirement or Life after the Kids Leave the Nest) Note about this "10 Turning Points" Series: A turning point is that...
Help! I’m Married to a Cheater! To Stay or to Go?
What does a Christian do when adultery is discovered? We were taught to value the sanctity of marriage. We learned that marriage was for life, and that God can save any marriage....